Redline Doc

Jul 4, 2009 - 2 minute read - Commentary

And the dirt falls...

Today we buried a cat. Not just a cat but a family cat of 14+ years. She came to us as a small fur bundle, not a handful, not eyes open yet, abandoned mewling. We tiger milk fed her with noises from the kids about what a pain she was .. .

And she became ours. She was first and foremost my daughter Shelley’s cat, sleeping with her, cuddling with her being her special friend through out her teen years. She was always a second tier cat until last August when the lead cat, Hobbes left us.

Today, as I dug the hole, a mitzvah, a good and special deed, and had help from my guys from Adam and from Jeff, making the hole deep enough wide enough to fit the box. We’d stored the cat in the freezer waiting for everyone to gather. She’s our last cat, last animal. We’ve lost many, dogs, fish ,birds, iguana, and cats. We’ve never been without some animal in the house even in our earliest days with gerbils (from graduate school) and then Svivon the cat who came to visit with us only for a short time. There was Anhanya who we adopted (let me tell you its easier to adopt children) and she stayed with us for nearly 23 years! So here we are … just us. The no kids thing we’ve adjusted to. They come home and we’re always glad to see them. But they leave and go to their own lives and their own fortunes and their own households and all of them have pets. Petless we are.

But as I dug the hole, I had a flash of my own mortality, of being IN the hole .. of hearing the dirt splash on me, of being covered of being morned and I can’t shake it. Its like a wet blanket. Despite a friend who came for the day, despite the children, despite Brenda – its hard to shake that cold feeling. And then to top that off, in the boom box parade, there was this specter, death pulling the death wagon and it was, for me, very real.

I know it will pass as will the mourning. I know we will search for another animal – we’d both love a dog but know that we’re really not at the level to care for such a responsibility another family member but we shall.

Annie was a good cat. I miss her